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Easy

Vernisha Tavares

It was easy wasn’t it?

Being young and free.

Nothing could hold you back.

The world was yours to own. To conquer.

The only thing you had to worry about was watching that episode of your favorite show or making sure your mom remembered to cut the edges off of your peanut butter and jelly sandwich.

It always had to be creamy peanut butter though, not the crunchy kind. No one likes the crunchy kind.

It was easy wasn’t it?

Wishing upon stars hoping that every one of them would come true.

Writing a Christmas list for Santa knowing that you were good this year so you knew you were going to get everything on that list but for some reason Santa would always slip a pair of socks in with all the toys and games.

It was easy wasn’t it? When school wasn’t so hard and everybody was your friend.

It was easy wasn’t it? Being young. Naïve.

It wasn’t easy was it?

Growing up in a world where the ideas of youth have now been demolished.

Where now your mother cannot cut the crust off of your sandwiches because she views you as old enough to do it on your own.

It wasn’t easy was it?

Realizing that not every wish you make comes true, in fact, how hardly any of them come true.

It wasn’t easy was it?

Understanding the how the harsh words of reality can actually hurt more that sticks and stones.

Bitch. Cunt. Ugly. Whore. Fat. Emo. Retarded. Stupid. Worthless. Loner.

You never thought you would hear these words would you?

No one does.

It wasn’t easy was it?

Learning fast that life won’t be kind to you just because you’re different than the rest.

Learning that the bullies on TV are a lot nicer than the bullies in high school.

Learning that your first love isn’t always the right one.

Knowing that a broken heart is more than just tears on a sad girl’s face.

Realizing that the monsters we once feared on TV were real and lived within us and all we surround ourselves with.

It wasn’t easy was it?

Having to find a job that you don’t even want to work at.

It wasn’t easy was it?

Losing every friend you once held dear to you.

It wasn’t easy was it?

Accepting that life isn’t as beautiful as it was when you were younger. Accepting that there are demons within us all and those demons never rest.

But was it easy?

When you breathed your last breath.

Was it easy, when you swallowed that last pill?

Drank that last beer?

Cut that last cut?

Took your last drive?

Shot that last shot?

Was it easy?


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